Is nothing sacred?

I know that there are certain sacrifices that mothers of boys have to make. I've had boys for going on eight years now. I'm good with it.

But seriously.

There are three toilets in this house. THREE!!!

Is it too much to ask to have the ONE toilet that is in the bathroom attached to MY bedroom be off limits? Do I not deserve a leak and dribble free zone, where I can sit without fear of what my cold, middle of the night rear will come in contact with? Am I not entitled to some space, even if it IS just the bathroom that is untainted by grimy children and all that they leave behind?

I love you boys. Really I do. But your bathroom skills are less than stellar. And I absolutely do not understand why, when it is the farthest toilet from any area of the house that you inhabit with any consistency, you still think it fun to run all the way downstairs, past two other bathrooms to get to mine.

So now... a new decree... issuing forth throughout the entire MommyJ household.

Mommy's toilet is off limits. Pee in the woods. Pee off the porch. But dribble on my toilet seat one more time... I tell you what. It won't be pretty.