Rollin with It

Four babies in, I was pretty sure I knew just about everything there was to know about raising babies. I knew how to get them to sleep through the night. I knew how to get them on an easy feeding schedule and how to encourage longer naps. I knew how to entertain a 1 year old through an hour of church. I knew how babies worked, how they thought. I was even pretty good (or so I thought) at preventing life altering baby meltdowns in aisle 4 of the grocery store.

And then Ivy was born.

She arrived a fiery, sparkly little ball of spunk and personality. She was a voracious eater, an even more voracious crier, and she liked to do things her very own way. All that I thought I knew about raising babies? Totally and completely irrelevant.

Did she sleep through the night? Well of course she did. When SHE was good and ready and not one second sooner. Did she eat on a schedule? Yes, yes she did. And it didn't look a single thing like the one I had mapped out in my head. Longer naps? When she feels like it. Quiet through church? Ha! That's a funny one.

One year in, I have figured a few things out. I know that if given a little bit of freedom to explore, Ivy will entertain herself for hours on end. I know that if I let her skip an early nap, she'll sleep for three, sometimes four hours in the afternoon. I know that if she cries longer than ten minutes or so before she goes to sleep, she won't EVER go to sleep unless you get her back up. I have learned that she is utterly and completely different than any of her siblings.

And that makes me smile. If anything, Ivy has taught me that mothering requires a great deal of "rolling with it." Sometimes, things that have always worked simply won't. It isn't because your baby is broken or your mothering is broken. It just means that babies and mothers are constantly changing and what works one day, or with one baby, might not work next time around. Ivy has reminded me how important it is to relax and let things play out. I could have spent a great deal of time stressing about the "when" of Ivy sleeping through the night. It took much longer than it did with the other children. But to what purpose? Stressing out  makes you stressful. And stressful mothers have stressful children. And stressful children NEVER sleep through the night. So why stress? All babies eventually sleep all night, just like all toddlers eventually learn to feed themselves, and all preschoolers eventually learn to potty train.

(This doesn't mean don't be a diligent parent. Not stressing does NOT equal hanging out on the couch watching daytime television and eating Twizzlers - everyone always says BonBons. But seriously... has anyone actually ever eaten one of those? - in case you thought I implied as much.)

But I do mean relax a little. Kids are fun. Even with all the ways that she has challenged me, Ivy is flippin fantastic to have around. I wouldn't change a single bit of her spunk and individuality. Not one single bit. I have no idea what Ivy will be like five years from now. But can I just tell you? I'm excited to find out.

*********
Don't forget... you still have two more days to enter the Shabby Apple Giveaway right here on this blog. Click here if you missed the post first time around.
Shabby Apple Giveaway on Mommy Snark